i knw d title is kinda dull n it deserves to be better esp cuz im writing a post after quite a long tym!! i have d most genuine explanation for my absence from this blog for almost 3 months..i am selfish n i come to my blog only when i need it, only when i need to pour my heart out. n not dat im surprised but d place dat i am at is such dat moods change almost every moment n i guess dat holds true for most of us n not just me! it still it still is no consolation for i was never like this or an alternate explanation could be i had misconceptions. i always wanted my blog to be a fun thing but it also is a place for introspection n i dont see anything wrong with it n yeah i knw introspection is done at a private forum. but not when ur seeking answers. not when ur willing to change for d good. n answers which are concrete n offer solutions.
d worst part being, in this beautiful(gross under estimation) weather, when i can feel rain drops on myself even though im sitting in my room cuz the wind blows them all over d place, im sitting hopelessly in my room doing nothing..i dont know what to do, dont know what i want to do n trust me a really scary truth just struck me..it is worse than the worst..i owe my mood swings not to myself but others..
isnt dat scary? but it is true!! shows how dependent i am on others..even on people who i did not think make too much difference to me..apparently they do!! u know wat? initially i would think i couldnt be wrong all the time..but now i've genuinely come to think data it is me whoz wrong..3600 times a day i think where have i gone wrong today? how did i hurt them today n what do i do to convince them? n it kills u trust me it does. all dis may sound crappy to most of u..
what will i not give to get over this? i cannot explain..hope no one reads this but if u do..please do not comment! thank u
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